Rant of the Week: Graduation


Whelp, I did it. I’m a college graduate. As I look back at the last four years of my life– at all the classes I took, the friends I made, the activities I participated in, the professors I learned from, Continue reading

The Official Guide to Your Next Year of College


Finals are over! You’re officially a sophomore/junior/senior/adult! Time for the obligatory Facebook post thanking your friends, family and haterz. First, let’s take a moment– go ahead, pat yourself on the back. You were able to suspend your disbelief in our Continue reading

Rant of the Week: I Gave Myself Nicotine Poisoning


I miss the good ol’ days–when depression was so much easier. Back when I was 13, man, being depressed was the shit. No responsibilities, no one was depending on you–you had all the time in the world to just curl up Continue reading

Fun Activities for Millenials: Go Outside and Stand in a Place


Our generation has a problem. I have a solution. When old people complain about Generation Y, they’ll often cite problems like our lack of communication skills or our disintegrating attention spans. In general, they see us as self-centered, entitled assholes who haven’t Continue reading

8 Lessons I Learned as a Sportswriter


Here’s my article from last week’s issue of the Lorian, in which I pretend to be an expert in something that I’ve only been doing for a year. This would be like if someone who had been 21 for less than Continue reading

“Deflate-gate:” a Final Solution

Hitler football

I got into the office bright and early last Tuesday and sat down to write an editorial about the silliness surrounding the “Deflate-gate” scandal that ravaged the sports media world in the week leading up to the Super Bowl. Somehow, my Continue reading

5 Ways to Overcome Writer’s Anxiety


You’re reading the Daily Dose. Last Thursday, I decided that I was going to write one blog post every day, for the rest of eternity. I didn’t even last a week. Yesterday, when I sat down to write during my approximately thirty minutes of free time– Continue reading

Dick Jr. Joins Ballet


You’re reading the “Daily Dose,” which is just about the laziest fucking name I could’ve come up with for this segment. Is that how this site is going to work now? We’re just going to go with the first over-used Continue reading

My Clothes are Fucked


You’re reading the Daily Dose! Which is apparently becoming a Yahoo Answers thread where I ask you all questions because I don’t know how to be a functioning adult.   I’m PISSED. I did laundry the other day, and as you can see, I Continue reading

Why Do I Drink?


You’re reading the “Daily Dose.” Why? I don’t know. You’re the one who clicked on the link. I’m sure we’ve all asked ourselves this question after a vomit-flavored night of fuckery. But have you ever actually stopped to think about Continue reading